Social Media : The good, the bad and the ugly

I have always found social media very difficult. I was very late to getting it as I didn't even get WiFi in my home until I was 14. Everyone was already leaps and bounds ahead of me and I wanted to feel involved. Socially it seemed amazing; being able to chat with friends outside of school what a wild concept! But I quickly started to realise it wasn't all good.

I found and still find social media very addictive. When I joined Facebook and Instagram at 14 I quickly became hooked and wanted to spend every moment of my time on it. When I'd scrolled through everything I could, watched all the videos imaginable on YouTube I became restless when I found a dead end. I'd keep refreshing in hopes to find something new. I also started to see how it affected my mood. Instead of hanging out with my family and friends, while we were together, I'd be on my phone, what started as me wanting to socialise and be clued in turned into me feeling very lonely and not present at all. If my phone lost connection or died, I'd feel nervous and lost without it. I no longer read as much as used to, reading a few pages before turning to check my phone. It was becoming a bit much.

At the start of 2019 I tried to do a social media detox for a month, it lasted 2 weeks and I couldn't even blame it entirely on myself. I gave people my mobile number in hopes that I wouldn't miss out and could keep in contact, but people still messaged me on Facebook, about uni and meet ups which I'd reply to in order to keep things running in my real life. It felt impossible to escape from, because everyone around me seemed just as dependant on it as me. Even when writing this I have stopped to check Instagram.

Even after taking 2 weeks off social media I realised how much of an affect it has on my mood and mental health. How it makes me feel restless and like I'm not achieving to the best of my abilities. How after going on Instagram or YouTube for an hour I feel on edge and like my brain can't shut down. This could be just me, as someone who can be very over stimulated by my surroundings but I do believe it does affect other people as well. The use of social media has been linked to peoples struggles with mental health. Although social media isn't the cause of a lot people's health and problems, it could be not helping, especially for those who have anxiety, as phone and computer usage is shown to over stimulate the brain, so when it is gone you become anxious as your brain looks for something as stimulating, which often times there isn't anything.

Although this will not be a cure for people, I hope some insight into the affects of social media could be helpful to people wanting to improve their mental health and connections with others. When I asked people on my Instagram on how social media effects their mental health, I got responses saying how they agreed as social media can often present life as better than it is. It can make us think about our weight and how it relates to our health and compare ourselves to people who seem to be doing better than us. However this isn't always real and we can really hide struggles and problems with social media. This can to an endless cycle of everyone feeling like everyone else is doing amazing when in reality we are just good ol' regular people living our lives.

We need to remember that social media is not our friend who we share the good, the bad and the ugly with. Its our photo album of our best moments. The amazing memories and qualities we share at job interviews. We are what we want to be. So I hope that through time I can start to tackle my screen time in the hopes of using technology to benefit me and my creativity rather than diminish it.

If you find social media doesn't have any negative effects on you that is amazing, and you keep doing you! But for those of us that can sometimes find it a bit much, just know that posting beautiful pictures should not get in the way of you living a beautiful life.

Now, here's some tips that I find help when I'm finding social media hard or feeling like I'm suffering from a bit of burn out.

1. Delete apps from your phone

This one really helps me when I am wanting to take a break for a few days. By deleting it I am removing the accessibility that social media has created. Through habit I do unlock my phone and look for the app but then I remember why I deleted it in the first place.

2.Leave your phone in the house when you go to meet friends and family

When I leave the house and I know I'm not going to be expecting any important calls or urgent messages, I often leave my phone at home so I am not tempted to use it when in the company of others. I like to really focus on their presence and show how much I care by giving them my whole attention. This often leaves me feeling refreshed as I feel like the interaction I have just had hasn't been for show or to post on social media.

3. Be Kind to Yourself

Remember that you are not what you post. By sitting back and thinking I am more than what I present on social media. I am the words I speak and the friendships I have. I am my passions and interests. This can be seen in social media but social media is not me. Doing the things that me you you can often leave you feeling happy to use social media as you want to express the things that make you up. By feeling inspired by yourself you are only going to create amazing things.

Thank you so much for reading! This is a topic that is near and dear to me so if you have any thoughts feel free to shoot me a message. If you have any advice or tips in using social media to benefit your life rather than diminish it I'd also love to hear.

Here is a little collection of photos that I think sum me up: